actually last night i went to slp super early.
cos angry with that fella.

woke up but soemthing i thought was a knock on the door..
like as if late for work liao..
den i startled awake.

my hands headed straight for his phone.
to check out what time is it.
open only, is a msg from Bingwen Pri
it says "ok"

i was thinking what ok? so i headed out to see other msgs...
one from Lay Shan Pri says" Hi ZHNPers (or smthg liddat). tmr 7pm Paragon Ding Tai Fung"
he forwarded to Bingwen n Yong Sheng..
so iguess it's his Pri sch meet up again.

dunno if he's going. but he did say anithing.
couldn't slp.. head thinking stuff... but nvm.. fell aslp anyways..
it was 2am.

i asked him this morning if he was going to do OT tonight?
he replied. dunno. Mayb.

still no news abt the 7pm paragon thing.
hmm.. even if not sure goign anot also can mention ma. -.-

frgt it. he can do wadsoever he wants.
i'm jus gonna go home tonight.

again! Alone on my Bdae Eve.
How nice is that?

Hate my life..

i don't need anyone else. i have my family.
i guess thats the most impt.

i dun need him either..

feeling really out of place recently.. feel like i dun belong..

last night i wanted to cook the Ham for him to eat. cos he said no meat.
den in the end get scolded as "dunno how to think". apparently mum just mopped the floor.

haix. pissed. den ltr he also pissed that i dun wan eat the corn.
like i dunno how to appreciate other pple cook for me.

i was just pissed. plus it was really hot.
haix. forget it. den he lose temper, stand up reli loudly and washed his plate.
went outside to sit.

again left me alone there..
i'm forever alone.
what's the point of having a bf? when im always alone?

alone when outside celebrating my bdae on Friday night?
alone when i wanna go back no hse to go back?
alone when i went to his place on Sat?
alone when i watch soccer, he ask me can keep my comments to myself anot?
alone when i slp at night?

i'm always alone. so sianx..

from today onward. it'll all be abt Me, Myself and I..
cos only i'll forever be with me...

we can nvr leave each other de. hahaha..

Omg.. boring.. haix.. falling aslp at work..

shipments slow.. den very little things to do.. slacking at work..

waiting for time to crawl to 5.30pm.. den head home...

Grey Area...

you know what's that?? its a small area right smack between right and wrong.. good and bad.. the unclear line which defines the total opposites...

Sitting in the grey area makes things.. easier.. because their unclear..
however pple tend to lean towards one side or another.. hoping it'll become clear to them soon..

Human nature they call it.
i wonder y..?

plagued by memories.. i'd like to call "Gin".
Gin won't leave me alone.
my ability to forget anything and everything, which i'd like to call "Loi", suddenly got lost somewhere in my bones or some tissue.. unablt to surface immediately when called upon...

looking for Loi to get rid of Gin.
Gin carries the grey area with her everywhere she goes..
Loi helps me "forget" Gin. So i can move on to the clearer part of life...

When Gin comes out, its scary.. because it means.. something.
i have yet to find out what something is.. but Gin sure knows what it is..

yea.. pple reading my blog might think i'm crazy.
but this is just Gin doing all these...
HAHA.. i'm sounding crazier by the second. Great.

Gin. Go Away!
Loi. Help!

**Falling in love with "Dark"... Because only when "Dark" is ard, you cant see anything.. whether it is visible by the naked eye or not.. you can't see shit. Probably 1 reason why i love "Dark" now..**

wondering if Dark could help Loi..hahaha..
ok stopping this crazy talk.